2023-05-08 A Phone Call & More Messages

The home ‘landline’ phone rang and I glanced at the Caller ID thinking it was another scam call. It was a South Bay hospital, one that Rick had been to twice for surgical procedures during his battle with cancer. They asked for Rick as they had billing questions regarding Medicare enrollment. I told them thatContinue reading “2023-05-08 A Phone Call & More Messages”

2022-12-30 A Birthday Tribute

Sharing a story of when I went to a beach Rick & I had meant to explore, but we never got the chance to go back after his cancer diagnosis. Since Rick ‘moved to paradise’ I am very aware of heart shapes: in clouds, leaves, rocks, etc. But there are some family and friends onContinue reading “2022-12-30 A Birthday Tribute”

2023-05-03 A Note to Sister & Brother Widows

I learned something on last week’s solo getaway. I roamed down a semi-private road of another Inn looking for somewhere to view the sun setting over the mighty Pacific. I was rewarded with a truly awesome sunset view! Rick & I loved exploring beaches/forests together, we both took photos & posed together. When I startedContinue reading “2023-05-03 A Note to Sister & Brother Widows”

2023-04-24 Party of 1, Living for 2

I took a weekday solo getaway, it was wonderful, a coastal area Rick & I always meant to explore. As I ‘celebrated Rick like confetti’ a wave came up so fast I didn’t get a chance to snap my usual photo of the heart drawing in the sand with a bit of ashes. So IContinue reading “2023-04-24 Party of 1, Living for 2”

2000-03-30 When It’s Meant to Be

In April 1999 I heard about a Christian Dating Service. Back then the process was to fill out a paper profile, supply a few pictures and make an interview video in their office. There were binders to thumb through and if you were interested in the paper profile you could view their VHS video andContinue reading “2000-03-30 When It’s Meant to Be”

2022-12-21 Hard Holidays

People seem stymied that I still straight-arm attempts to send me ‘holiday cheer’. With each well-meaning effort I am gutted that some family and friends can’t seem to recognize the draining loss that he is not here now. Although milestone dates like our wedding anniversary and Valentine’s Day are tough, they do not have theContinue reading “2022-12-21 Hard Holidays”

2022-03-20 Seeing Blooms & Blessings

As I walk into my third year with Rick not on this earthy plain I am getting better at being more deliberate in practicing mindfulness. I take time to notice not just flowers but their hues and details. I notice not just the change of temperature walking out my front door, but the scent inContinue reading “2022-03-20 Seeing Blooms & Blessings”

2022-01-01 Going Back Two Years

Today dawned clear & cold (32 f) and I recalled Jan 1, 2020, which now it is such a wonderful memory. In 2020 Rick had just completed his first round of chemo and his ‘markers were down’ (indicating his tumor was possibly shrinking). He could now digest food and the pain meds were helping –Continue reading “2022-01-01 Going Back Two Years”

2021-10-22 The Writing Prompt

A Widow/Widowers group I am in has daily prompts to share our experience. This week one of the prompts was to describe what our loved one looked like. The words just started tumbling from my head & heart and my fingers could barely keep up typing. The first paragraph below was my post, the secondContinue reading “2021-10-22 The Writing Prompt”